Conversation with Noah today:
(N) "On my way to chipotle today, I encountered an old lady carrying two large bags from the grocery store. She asked me, 'is it Monday?' "
(me) "Please tell me you did not mug her and take the groceries. Please."
(N) " 'Fuck no', I replied. Then, reconsidering my antisocial rudeness, I brightened up my face and said, "no, I mean, it's Tuesday. It really is." She just looked confused.
I am so proud of myself, I'm going to go get ice cream."