At my oh-so-glamorous job at the theater, one of the things I do is change the rolly rack of hand towels for the bathroom. For the first time, I read the warning label on the dispenser: WARNING- FAILURE TO FOLLOW PRINTED DIRECTIONS EXACTLY MAY RESULT IN SERIOUS INJURY OR DEATH.
Really? On a rolly-hand-towel dispenser? I'm having a hard time picturing that. I think the worst injury one would sustain might be chipping a nail on the towel guard. Somehow, I don't think that my eventual demise (or anyone else's) will be due to faulty use of a hand towel.
There is an ill-advised ad campaign for yet another flavored rum (Tattoo: because the hangover is permanent!) and it's creeping up on bus shelter ads near you. The ad shows a rather beefy male arm with a very late-90's "tribal" tattoo wound around the phrase "No Regrets". Um, that's a shitty tattoo, and I'm pretty sure you're going to regret it as soon as you graduate from college and move out of the frat house, sir.