I got paid today.
However, I also did my March budget today (and oops, I might not have
gone to Trader Joe's last weekend if I'd done this budget in advance
like a good girl), and I'm going to be running a deficit this month.
Shit. And this just when I finally get my home wifi up and running,
the better to facilitate internet shopping! Well, looking at the
internet wistfully, anyway. If given a magical credit card with no
need to actually pay the bill, the following would be my lust objects
these "Kelly" shoes,
appropriately enough, in gorgeous kelly green. They're not the sweet
fake-snake of the Jeffrey Campbells, but I just can't stomach the insipid mint green color. And whee, they're a cooler color than the Tory Burches and for 1/3 the price!
to fulfill my need for snakeskin shoes, these Nine West flats
and more Nine West, in a lovely gold leather flat to best approximate the gorgeous, bajillion-dollar Lanvins that I will never ever own.
metallic silver & gold Chucks
(see! mostly shoes that aren't obscenely expensive! self-control!)
J Brand mid-rise bootcuts
yet another pair of Joe's Jeans "Muse"
and tailoring to bring in the waist
of my other jeans and work pants, which have gone from "slouchy" to
"clearly a size too large"
the elusive grey tonal-striped tee I covet
every other thing on the American Apparel website, including more long tanks, a skinny orange scarf, and stretchy dresses
a decent pair of sunglasses that
will not break upon contact with the floor (which means I'll probably
have to shell out for more than the $4.80 sunglasses at Heartbreaker)
more titacular bras, and then some sports bras for when it's best not to buttress cleavage up up and away
a trashy-fabulous cobalt blue vinyl handbag, clearly a one-season accessory, with bonus points if it resembles the Marc Jacobs Stam bag.
Estimated cost of my wishlist: somewhere between $1,000 and WHAT IN GOD'S NAME DO YOU MEAN, MY DISCOVER CARD IS MAXED OUT?
Probability of actually purchasing any of these things: vaguely possible (in the event that the IRS decides to give me back all the taxes I paid in, plus a little extra just for fun) to utterly delusional.
Probability of me going through my liquor cabinet before the month is through to dull the pain of a single-digit checking account balance: medium-high. Orange alert!