However, I also did my March budget today (and oops, I might not have
gone to Trader Joe's last weekend if I'd done this budget in advance
like a good girl), and I'm going to be running a deficit this month.
Shit. And this just when I finally get my home wifi up and running,
the better to facilitate internet shopping! Well, looking at the
internet wistfully, anyway. If given a magical credit card with no
need to actually pay the bill, the following would be my lust objects
for spring:


these "Kelly" shoes,
appropriately enough, in gorgeous kelly green. They're not the sweet
fake-snake of the Jeffrey Campbells, but I just can't stomach the insipid mint green color. And whee, they're a cooler color than the Tory Burches and for 1/3 the price!

to fulfill my need for snakeskin shoes, these Nine West flats

and more Nine West, in a lovely gold leather flat to best approximate the gorgeous, bajillion-dollar Lanvins that I will never ever own.
metallic silver & gold Chucks

lace-overlay pumps
(see! mostly shoes that aren't obscenely expensive! self-control!)
J Brand mid-rise bootcuts
yet another pair of Joe's Jeans "Muse"
and tailoring to bring in the waist
of my other jeans and work pants, which have gone from "slouchy" to
"clearly a size too large"
the elusive grey tonal-striped tee I covet
every other thing on the American Apparel website, including more long tanks, a skinny orange scarf, and stretchy dresses

a decent pair of sunglasses that
will not break upon contact with the floor (which means I'll probably
have to shell out for more than the $4.80 sunglasses at Heartbreaker)
more titacular bras, and then some sports bras for when it's best not to buttress cleavage up up and away
a trashy-fabulous cobalt blue vinyl handbag, clearly a one-season accessory, with bonus points if it resembles the Marc Jacobs Stam bag.

Estimated cost of my wishlist: somewhere between $1,000 and WHAT IN GOD'S NAME DO YOU MEAN, MY DISCOVER CARD IS MAXED OUT?
Probability of actually purchasing any of these things: vaguely possible (in the event that the IRS decides to give me back all the taxes I paid in, plus a little extra just for fun) to utterly delusional.
Probability of me going through my liquor cabinet before the month is through to dull the pain of a single-digit checking account balance: medium-high. Orange alert!
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