(Um, yesterday's post was nearly incoherent. Sorry. "I want things! Things do not exist! Oh no! This saves me money and time!")
This week, I accidentally kicked the Director of the Contemporary Arts Center in the elbow. And then I continued to kick her for the next two minutes. At this point, if she does not remember my name, I will continue kicking!
Just kidding. What really transpired was a hamstring-breaking Yogalates class, which I foolishly decided would be a great, relaxing introduction back into a daily yoga practice. Aside from the bit about me never having done Pilates before, I also haven't kept up with yoga for the past two months or so, which leads to situations in which the yoga studio is extremely crowded, and Raphaela takes the mat directly to my left, and then the balance-on-your-right-arm-and-arch-your-back-and-kick! poses begin, and I, being unable to do graceful swinging kicks and balances, commence smacking of her right elbow with my left foot. Not once, oh no, but about seven times. Oops.
(Now my entire upper body is so sore it hurts to put on a coat, pointing out all the muscles that exist in name only. Those muscles are now screaming "why in god's name did you attempt that arm balance?!?")
And yet, despite my best efforts to break her arm, Raphaela not only did not avoid my potentially uncontrollable limbs in the office today, but went out of her way to be awesome. I suppose that I can't suggest that you, too, should repeatedly hit the person upon whom you really would like to make a favorable impression, but it seems to work for me.
I'm off to go smack around next quarter's Managerial Accounting professor, then.