Tuesday April 22, 2008

Why do I keep getting my hopes up for those collaborative design lines from the Gap, H&M, Target, and such?  The last line I enjoyed was Libertine for Target, and that was nearly a full year ago.  Erin Fetherston and Jovovich Hawk didn't do it for me this year, and the new GO stuff is just too nu-rave for me.  I'll wear neon nail polish, but that's as close to the mid 90's as I'm comfortable with.

I thought, however, that the CFDA/Gap collaboration might change my mind.  The ad campaign with Philip Lim standing there looking all smart and erudite was so clean!  That threeasfour dress looked so easy and lovely and striking!  Thus, I went to the Gap last week to molest the racks of pretty fancy "white shirts".


I was thoroughly underwhelmed.  Maybe it is my lifelong aversion to ruffles (if you can find a single ruffled thing in my closet, you can have it, because it clearly was let in by mistake), or maybe it's that I'm very rarely to be found wearing white, but I could not get excited about any of the pieces.  Really, in what situation will I wear a half-sleeved button-up with elbow poofs?  The threeasfour dress seemed to be worth a try-on, so I gave it a chance. 

It did not live up to expectations.  The seaming made my hips look odd, my boobs look flattened, and generally reminded me of the time in 1996 when I decided to make a minidress by cutting apart a pillowcase.  Granted, my dress experiment did not involve fancy curved asymmetrical seams, but neither did it cost $88.

In consolation, I scooted to DSW to use up some serious coupons, and acquired a new pair of running shoes AND a pair of brown patent reptile-print heels for under $100.  I'm fully aware that all these coupons and "special offers" and Premium Member Cards are sent to me to encourage this kind of reckless footwear fetishism (but do running shoes really count towards my shoe purchase tally?  I mean, they're practical!), but goddamn, DSW, keep those super-sales going on for me.  Next year, when I'm doing my student loans budget, I'll be sure to put in a specific line item for you.

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