That doesn't look safe, D.

You might have a point there, but I was seized by the idea that I had to replace the homemade chandelier in the living room with something more light-diffusing. I am getting very picky about flattering lighting in my increasing age, see, and then I saw this how-to for a ceiling-mounted drum shade, and yes, I got a little fixated.

one $3 drum shade, two yards of grey fabric, one yard of muslin (I think it was muslin? I don't know, I found it in the bottom of my fabric box in the closet and I have no idea what I bought it for), fabric glue, spray adhesive, two yards of twill tape, and four huge hex nuts.

How to:
Cut the drum shade down to the preferred depth if it's too tall. Mine was too tall. I was all ready to get crafty with the x-acto knife, but no, scissors worked just fine.

Iron the muslin and cut out a circle of fabric around the bottom of the shade, leaving a little bit of overlap. Glop on some fabric glue and adhere the muslin to the outside edge of the shade.

Aleene's Tacky Glue is like childhood in a squeeze bottle. I spent a goodly chunk of my childhood in the craft store/ in the basement gluing sequins to things/ covered in tempera paint.

If, like mine, your shade was not very pretty and had a bunch of odd stains on it, you'll cover it with a pretty fabric. This grey stuff was on sale, hooray! I ironed it (note: ironing TWO THINGS IN ONE NIGHT? My god, my ironing board has not had that much use in months. Seriously. I refuse to iron.), and then, in a direct contradiction of the spray-glue instructions telling me to use it only in a well-ventilated area, I just sprayed the lampshade with the adhesive and smoothed on the fabric. Is it perfectly smooth? No, but I don't really care. After all, it's like eight feet above my head, so screw it.

Hooray, almost done! Glop some more fabric glue on the twill tape to cover the bottom seam of muslin+glue+other fabric and edge the bottom of the shade with it.

(At this point, you may notice that your cat is freaking out and starting to throw up. This might be because you just used a bunch of spray adhesive in your un-ventilated kitchen, or might be because cats are weird and puke a lot. If you're me, you'll just say "ah, as long as I don't get dizzy or fall over, it's probably fine". Avoid stepping in cat puke.)

Take off the ugly glass dome cover of the light fixture and save the finial to screw it back on. Thread the metal post of the fixture through the lampshade's hanger part thingy, and shove three or four hex nuts onto the post to make the shade closer to the ceiling. Screw the finial onto the bottom of the post to hold it all together.

Yes, I am standing on an Ikea stool on top of my coffee table to get at the light.
No, I don't own a ladder. Yes, this seemed easier than acquiring a ladder.

Look, you have a new ceiling light, and it's rather pretty!

Man, I hope the cat stops throwing up soon.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

That is one good-looking lampshade.

And get a ladder, lady!